I thought I might update here at last, since it's been nine weeks since I last did, and my most recent entry (recent being a relative term, of course) is still rather upsetting for me.

I'm 24 now, which really doesn't feel all that different from 23. *waves little flag*

I've got a couple new RP pairs that are making me all squee and fuzzy inside. One of them is based in phyrbyrd's "Genesis Era" universe -- anthros in a Steampunk-ish desert setting. Safi the dunecat and Kletz the sand dog have such a great dynamic I do the happy wiggle just thinking about them.

The other is one that started off based on the Foam Ghetto puppet universe, but CousinKevin on Y! and I decided it's just easier to RP them in private as humans. X3 And if anything of theirs makes it into public on the club. I can't believe something that started out as nothing but crack and porn has become so important to me.

In non-RP news, I heard a fox in my front yard last night. I was just sitting downstairs on the computer when all of a sudden I heard this weird cry; it made me think of cats mating or an injured crow or something. So I go outside to see, and what I find is this fox loping across the street! She (I think it was a vixen looking for a mate) disappears into the shadows, screams one more time, and then is just gone. It was amazing, right up there with the hawk that perched on our deck a couple of summers ago.

More later, when I'm more awake. Maybe. :P

Noishe is officially retired.

Apparently Seir's husband is too uncomfortable with the idea of her RPing relationships, meaning, basically, that Rhomelys and Noishe aren't allowed to be together. This was try number six for Noishe to be happy. Six seperate relationships, and all of them fail because of OOC circumstances.

Loki never intended to let Tayhne get into a relationship in the first place, and basically used Noishe as a method to make her character even more emo.
Kah'do couldn't get her head on straight OOCly about whether she wanted to RP a relationship or not. At night she would say go for it, and literally the next morning would change her mind. Over and over and over again.
Keionys only wanted a cybering buddy for when he couldn't get a hold of his real RP partners.
October got so enamoured with MG she ninja-transferred and left Noishe in the lurch. This has since been recanted, but the hurt was still there.
Sandra has decided she doesn't even care to speak to me, let alone RP with me, and all our RP, including that between Noishe and Sargonas, has been forgotten.
And now this thing with Seir...

Okay, karma. I give up. You win. I can take a hint. Noishe wasn't meant to be happy.

( First part cut because it's about my crazy ex again... )

In happier news, Seiron finally comes back from Iraq today or tomorrow! Squee!! I'm so excited! I'm so glad she's going to be home, and I'm glad we'll be able to play together again. I'm also glad that she seems as excited/obsessed with our Rhomelys/Noishe pairing as I am! She's already drawn or started drawing like half a dozen pictures of them together. *does a happy wriggle*

I've got a surprise waiting for her when she comes back. We toyed with the idea of my paladin Eradin being reborn as a death knight, and the RP possibilities that would bring for him and Seir's priest Kesain. So, a few days ago, I rolled "Mournbrand" -- Eradin Mournbrand, to be exact -- and I've been leveling him like woah. I can't wait for her to meet him!

ETA: It never ceases to amaze me how hate-filled and angry some people can be. It also never ceases to amaze me the human capacity for petty cruelty. Because I argued with someone about druids being "cheap" for using the root-cast-HoT method in PvP, and because I finally got tired of my opinions and choices being constantly and harshly judged by this person (newsflash, dear, they are MY characters, I can do what I like with them), this means I deserved to be abandoned by my friends. That stung a little, I admit, but if this person was truly seeking to hurt me that way, they should have gotten at me before my ex Krys got through with me years ago.

ETA Again: As a wonderful counterpoint to the previously mentioned nastiness: Seiron's presents arrived today! She sent me a beautiful pink and sparkly scarf, a little incense burner, some Iraqi money, and a postcard. She even included a little doodle of Eradin and Kesain on the postcard. XD

Fuck you, Blizzard.

FUCK YOU for making a quest-mob that FORCES the druid to use magic.

FUCK YOU for reinforcing this concept that all druids should carry at least three sets of gear, possibly four!

I'm a fucking tank/dps! There should be NO situation where I am EVER healing so much that it would require a CASTING SET of ANY KIND.

I am NOT going to waste money I don't have on gear that I don't need, that I would use ONCE and then trash.

Fuck you and ALL your attitudes about druids.

So Courtnay and I made up (again) tonight, and snuck off to a completely new server to have some fun together. We ended up rolling draenei: me a paladin and her a hunter. They're childhood friends that are way more attached to each other than eithe of them realized (until tonight, of course).

We tromped off to Dun Morogh for our starting area and did some random RP in Anvilmar with a pair of gnomes. Then Cataan (my paladin) and Olezkov (her hunter) snuck off to have a private chat about why Olezkov was so pissed off about Cataan focusing so hard on his studies. Near the end of it they had this omgwtfbbq disgustingly romantic exchange that I HAD to record, mostly for my own posterity.


Cataan: No... No, I won't let you! I won't let you put yourself in danger for me!
Olezkov: Really? Is that how your love works, Cataan? You love me so you won't let me defend you?
Olezkov: I'm not buying that shit. I'm going to go out there and fight alongside you, live alongside you, die alongside you.
Cataan feels his nails digging into his palms, but only distantly, as he stars at Olezkov's hooves, trying to reconcile his anger and fear with the way those words made him melt inside.
Cataan: I can't... let you... I can't let you die for a cause that isn't even your own.
Olezkov reaches out and takes Cataan's cheek, but pushes him roughly to the side and presses his body against him, backing him against a dry spot on the building. "My cause is you," he mutters, then presses his lips firmly and hotly against his friend's.

And I proceeded to explode from the cute.

I wish I could articulate my feelings well enough so people could understand.

I wish I wasn't so completely alone.

I wish I knew that if I broke, someone would be there to put me back together.

I wish I knew that if I broke, someone would just care that it had happened.

I wish I felt loved.

I wish I felt wanted.

I wish I didn't feel so used and taken for granted.

I wish I had someone to defend me when someone else hurts my feelings.

I wish I knew that the person I consider my best friend would still be my best friend tomorrow, or next week, or next month.

I wish I could feel happy without always wondering when the other shoe was going to drop.

If I can't have that, I wish I was depressed enough to commit suicide, instead of being stuck in this... morass of lonely and hurt and sad.

I wish my friends didn't abandon or ignore me for days or weeks on end because they know I'll still be here waiting whenever they come back.

I wish they weren't right in knowing that I'll still be here waiting whenever they come back.

I wish a lot of things.

ETA: I am now a proud owner of a copy of the Collector's Edition of Wrath of the Lich King! I won a guaranteed copy during a trivia contest! In fact, there were two trivia contests, and each one was one by a girl! *laughs*

The winning question was: Name one of the three dark Naaru in World of Warcraft. Both I and the other player both got it right (M'uru), so we were asked to name another. I said D'ore, he couldn't answer. The CE, she is mine!

~~

They finally licensed Hunter x Hunter! *does the happy dance of joy*

And I'm going to a midnight release party for WotLK tonight to snag myself a Collector's Edition. :) Let's hope Blizzard actually manages to have their servers up so people can actually play it. How the heck do you break the mail system, anyway?

I don't care about the struggles (or the progress) of minority groups.

But I think I'm actually angrier at the comments on the entry than the original writer (or maybe not; the post is very much froth-inducing), because a bunch of them basically say "oh god you're sooooo smart and brave for writing this even though I don't agree with what you say! You go girl!"

NO.

NO.

PREJUDICE IS NOT OKAY IN ANY FORM, NO MATTER HOW ELOQUENTLY IT MIGHT BE EXPRESSED.

Wow, so much to report! Well, maybe not so much, but definitely some big things.

For the past two weeks I've been visiting Sandra and Daniel (Sargonas/Zel and Rowe) down in Kentucky. I was a little worried at first, 'cause meeting someone in person is a lot different than hanging out with them online. But we got along great. I wasn't ready to come home! We watched all kinds of movies, played all kinds of WoW, and they even got me hooked on Spore. :P Sandra and I RP'd a ton, and Noishe and Sarg are finally ready to get married. They even started talking about the kid issue. (We've decided they'll have kids once Sarg dies and is reborn as a DK, because Noishe's "omfg I lost him once what if I lose him again" instincts will kick in. XD)

And, and... do you remember the beautiful, sweet little Papillon I mentioned in my last entry, the one that we fell in love with? Well, at the time, she wasn't for sale, because her breeder was showing her. Well, I hadn't been at Sandra's place for even a week before I found out that the breeder decided Hope just didn't like showing, and did we still want her! Of course my parents said yes, and so now Hope is ours.

She is amazingly affectionate and funny and smart. I bought her a squeaky seahorse toy while I was in Kentucky, and she loves it. She's also already figured out the "fetch" game: in fact, right now as I'm sitting at the computer, she keeps hopping into her beanbag and setting her squeaky on the computer tower when she wants me to throw it. And when she wants pets, she'll stand there and give you the most mournful, pleading look in the universe. She's such a little diva. I'll definitely have to take some pictures of her and upload them on the web. ^.^

It's a definite change from Raspberry, who was very independent through his whole life. He was perfectly happy to sit in his window all by himself, just doing his own thing all day. But Hope has to be around us all the time; she even stood outside the bathroom door this morning waiting for me to finish my shower (yes, she's accepted me that quickly!).

It's a definite adjustment, but I don't think we could have designed a better dog. I really agree with a friend of mine who said that it must have been Raspberry watching out for us.

Well, it's been a while since I last updated, but it's been something of a crazy month. Raspberry passed away on the 5th, and we had my dad's 70th birthday a few days later, plus family staying over, and some changes at home that led to me only being able to be online a couple hours a day. I've ended up watching a lot of DVDs since I can't be online. x.X In the past week or so alone I've gone through Sorcerous Stabber Orphen seasons 1 and 2 (a combined 54 episodes), Here is Greenwood, The Cat Returns, Spirited Away, and about half a dozen standalone short anime movies. And probably some others I'm forgetting. X.x I just got started on my collection of Yu Yu Hakusho DVDs.

In other news, we'll be getting a new puppy early next year. :D We went to a dog show in Cheyenne on Saturday and met the sweetest, most mellow Papillon you can imagine. The Papillons had showed at 9AM, so her owner let us pick her up, and she just laid in my arms like she was ready to go to sleep there. She even put her head down on my elbow! It was more than enough to swing Dad over to "our side" -- he'd originally wanted a Schnauzer, while both Mom and I wanted a Papillon. So we exchanged information with her owner, who is also a breeder, and she'll (the breeder) let us know when one of her bitches is pregnant and if any of the puppies suit our needs (we want a mellow, cuddly male pup). But since dog gestation is about 2 months, and the breeder doesn't let her pups go until 12 weeks, we won't get our puppy until early next spring, probably. But still, puppy!